Nonverbal Gender Differences

There are some significant nonverbal gender differences that separate men's and women's communication styles even more.

Of course, everything written here is about the gender groups in general.

You may know people who don't display any of the traits for their group, people who display some of traits from the opposite gender, and some who seem to have them all!

Remember that this is just a guide to help you understand some of the nonverbal gender differences and relate better to the opposite sex. Enjoy!

Women:

• use facial and body motions generally to signal approachability and friendliness

• use fewer and more restrained gestures

• smile even when not happy due to socialized rules of women needing to be more expressive

• are attracted to those who smile more

• use facial expression a lot to send and receive messages

• tilt their head and body to the side more often

Men:

• use facial and body motions to indicate more reservation and control

• use gestures more often

• display less emotion through smiling due to socialized rules to remain emotionally neutral

• are more likely to interrupt speakers who are smiling (often women)

• don't send or interpret facial expressions as frequently

• have a more relaxed posture

• nod their head a lot

Men aren't as used to showing or reading facial expression, posture, or gestures. Therefore they can easily miss physical clues their girlfriends are sending about their own feelings.

And women expect that men will be tuned in to the feelings they are exhibiting through their body language. This nonverbal gender difference causes a lot of confusion as men often just don't get what they're supposed to be looking for and why, and women feel unloved or out of touch with their partner.

Women:

• rarely stare

• engage in more eye contact while conversing

• signal interest by sustaining eye contact

• break eye contact more often

• are generally the first to avert their eyes on an initial gaze

Men:

• stare, perhaps to challenge power or status

• signal interest by staring

• generally don't make as much eye contact as women

• generally maintain initial gaze until other party averts their eyes

Men have a tendency to not make as much eye contact as women would like during conversations. This nonverbal gender difference makes women feel like men aren't paying listening, aren't interested, or are distracted by something else.

Women use eye contact as a way to show their interest and attention and can be hurt when they don't get that in return from men. And since men don't do that with other men, they don't know to do that with women.

Women:

• are touched more than men

• associate touch with warmth and expression

• are touched more gently

• initiate more hugging and touching that expresses support, affection, and comfort

Men:

• are touched less than women

• initiate touch towards women more

• are often touched roughly

• use touch to direct, assert power, and express sexual interest

It's easy for men to misinterpret women's physical contact as sexual interest. In fact though, many women simply express their camaraderie and connection with others through physical touch. This misinterpretation can result in hurt feelings on both ends.

Women:

• use less personal space

• have their space invaded more frequently, especially by men

• prefer face to face conversation

Men:

• use more personal space

• are more likely to invade others personal space, especially women's

• prefer side by side interaction

This is one nonverbal gender difference that often really frustrates women--Why doesn't he face me when we're having a conversation?

Women are used to, and prefer, talking while facing each other. It feels more intimate and enhances the sense of connection. Women often interpret a man's side-by-side preference as a lack of interest or poor listening.

Did you connect with any of the nonverbal gender differences on this page? It's easy to see how these differences can really impact a conversation.

By understanding a little more about how the opposite sex uses body language, you have a better chance of communicating in a more effective way!

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